Liking is an Emotion, Love is a Devotion

I write this note because I believe love is one of the most commonly overlooked secularized views held by many Christians today (One thing to keep in mind is that a secular view is taken from a stand point of the lack of existence of God). We view love as being a feeling we get, and we then attempt to apply that to a biblical usage of the word. I find this to be inaccurate for many reasons. I share some of these reasons in this note. I am positive that there is something to be taken away from this note for everybody, and that it is worth the read if it is an area of interest for you. I apologize for the length of this note, but to not go into detail about this topic would be no better than the means on how the view of love has came to be what it is today.

Liking is an emotion, Love is a Devotion
I think it's wise to start with the common misconception that- love is a more serious and in-depth form of "liking someone." That is not love. That is emotions. Emotions have there role in love, but are in no way an actual part of the foundation for love. Emotions are a result of love, that comes from the commitment of caring for each other and spending time with each other. However, those emotions should not change love itself. Emotions are subjective, meaning that it is dependent on some kind of influence that is subject to interpretation and change. So how can we expect something of subjectiveness to be one in the same, or even a part of, something that is supposed to be unconditional and unchanging? It can't be done. Because if emotions (which are conditional) are a part of unconditional love, then it is contradicting to say that the love is actually unconditional. Emotions change quite frequently, yet the love I speak of is supposed to be unchanging. So if unconditional love is not based on emotions, there must be something consistent that it is based upon.

Complete Consistency is found in God alone
One thing we need to realize is that nothing about humans is consistent, other than their inconsistency due to the consistency of sin since the fall of man. We are imperfect and cannot find consistency unless it is found in God. God is the only completely consistent being. So whatever unconditional love is based upon, it must be fulfilled through God in someway or another. Throughout the Bible, we see that sometimes God is angry with His chosen people. God has emotions that vary with actions that are taken by people. This does not mean God is inconsistent. With every action in a specific situation, God will feel the same. He is consistent in feeling distaste with all sin. So how can God be angry with someone, yet love them as well? His emotions are obviously not a part of His love. The consistency of His love is found in His covenant. God's love is found in His commitment to His chosen people, in that He will continually love those who He has called to be sons and daughters of Him. So unconditional love is in fact a commitment. How can humans love like this if humans constantly break commitments? Humans are in no way perfect, and that is why humans break commitments. However, commitment in it's very nature is intended to be consistent. When someone makes a promise, they state they are to never go against their word and that it will forever remain in that condition. Our imperfection has diminished this idea. When the word promise is said today, people think it means you are simply going to try really hard to keep your word. However, a promise in it's truest nature is to NEVER be broken. This brings us back to my point made earlier, that unconditional love must be fulfilled through God.

Emotions should be a result of Love
It is in complete reliance in Him that we find righteousness, as well as the ability to keep commitments. Through keeping this commitment by the ability given by God, we then find emotions. They are a result of love, rather than an actual part of love or love itself. When talking about love, emotions are only connected with love when you look at the product of the commitment. Not that emotions don't come about other ways either. However I believe that emotions that are not built upon a commitment will be no means for making a decision such as marriage or salvation. My reasoning for this is that both of those examples are lasting commitments. They are commitments that are to not be broken. However if you make a decision to marry someone or make a decision to follow Christ, this decision will not be followed through with on the basis of emotion. Again, emotion is not unconditional or unchanging. That is why the commitment is so important.

The Commitment of Love is made by...
So, what grounds is the commitment of love made on? Well I find that the most logical answer is to seek the consistency of what God does in someone's life, and whether or not that consistency matches up with your convictions and desires. When you find someone that God is constantly developing in the likeness of Him, and you find reason to believe that He will continue to do that, and if that is something you truly desire in your relationship; you then find good reasoning to make the commitment of love. This also brings up the issue of what should be desired most in another person. I personally believe that if anything is valued more about a person other than: that person's desire for God, the way God consistently works in that person's life, or the hope you find that God will continue to do a work in that persons life; then there is flaw in what is most valued about that person. I am not saying other things can't be valued, but that these things must be valued most.

1 Corinthians 13:4-7
"(4) Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. (5) It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. (6) Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. (7) It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

I believe that love is the commitment to practice these things. This actually brings me to my last point. In verse 6 it reads, "Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth." Jesus said, "I am the way, the truth, and the life." Therefore, for us to love anything more than Jesus Christ, is in fact not love at all. Because that would be idolatry, which is a sin, which is evil that does not rejoice in the Truth, Jesus Christ. Rather, this love I speak of should always point us to and remind us of the love Christ has for us.

In the end...
In conclusion, without the commitment of sacrificial love you have nothing more than a secular infatuation that is perceived by many to be love. It is not wrong to have an infatuation by any means, but it must be based on the commitment of love if it is to in fact be called love. Secondly, love is only obtained through God. I do not believe that someone who has not truly experienced the revelation of God's love, can show love. It is through God that we are even able to keep the commitment of this love. Finally, it all points back to God. The one thing we should love more than anything else, the only thing that should be valued more than everything else, is and always will be God. To make a higher commitment to anything else is idolatry. Along with that, but every love relationship we have should be a reflection of Christ's love for us and other people. As John Piper puts it, "Love labors and suffers to enthrall us with what is infinitely and eternally satisfying: God."

I am not stating that every single part of this is 100% correct or that you have to agree with me on this. The more I find out about love, the more I realize it is too complex for me to fully understand it in its entirety. However, I do think it is something we can and must approach in a Biblical manner, which is worth seeking out.

My History of Fathers

This is my testimony. I hope it touches your life in someway or another. It is long, but trust me, this is the extremely shortened version. There are many stories in-between that could have given you a better vision of what kind of past I have experienced, but none of that is really necessary (but if you do have any questions, feel free to message me). The important thing is that Jesus Christ is my Lord and Savior, and this is how I came to know Him, and how He has worked in my life. Let’s rejoice in the Lord, how He is working now, how He has worked in the past, and will work in the future.

I was raised in a non-Christian home. My father was an alcoholic child abuser/ wife beater. Numerous times, me and my mother would be beaten after my father came in from having one too many beers. Thankfully, my younger brother (who is 1 ½ years younger than me) never had to experience any of this pain.

My mom eventually left him, but only to marry a less abusive man (who had two sons). My step-father was extremely verbally abusive, but much less physically abusive.

My first steps in a church happened one Sunday when my parents wanted to kick me and my brothers out of the house. They dropped us off at a local Pentecostal church and picked us back up when it was over. This happened for about a year. I eventually got older and decided I didn’t like the church, and I asked my parents if I could go to the church across the street from our house. I went to that church for a couple months until I gave up church all together, due to not fitting in anywhere.

In the seventh grade, I made a friend by the name of Jeremy Shaull. Jeremy was, and still is, the goofiest looking guy I had ever seen (to be honest… lol) However, he had a heart of gold and was the most loyal friend a guy could ask for. I started hanging out with Jeremy and he eventually invited me to come to church with him. He attended FBC Cyril, at the time. I really did not like the idea of church at all, but I gave it a try a couple times.

Summer came around, and I had been going to church off and on. One day Jeremy came up to me and invited me to go to church camp with him. I didn’t want to go, but the church offered to pay my way. So I went to Falls Creek for the first time in my life. During the week I saw something I had never seen before. I saw a spiritual atmosphere where God was moving constantly, I saw people who actually cared for me, and I saw the spirit of God move in me for the first time. In the later part of the week, I was on my way back to the cabin after getting me a couple icee’s (you know one isn’t gonna be enough with me… lol), and a couple of people stopped to talk to me. They started off by asking me the question: “Do you know where you would go if you died today?” Of course I didn’t know, but I said that I hope I go to heaven. They then asked me how I knew that and if I had ever accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior. It came down to me realizing that I had sin in my life (which would result in my eternal death), Jesus had paid for my sin, and that I had an extreme need for Him in my life. On that day I met the third father figure to come into my life, but the first true and loving Father for me to ever meet, the Creator of all things, God. As for the people who shared the gospel with me, I haven't seen them since.

I continued to go to church at FBC Cyril for the next 7 years. During that time, I met the closest thing I have ever had to an earthly father, who came into my life 2 ½ years after my salvation. His name was Casey King, and he moved from Guymon, OK to Cyril to be the Youth/Music Minister of FBC Cyril. He was the first person to ever disciple me and teach me how to live a biblical life.

I continued on with my journey with Christ, but still found myself struggling with many things in my life. My brothers had started to come to church, but my parents didn’t. The negative influence from them was a huge controlling factor in my life, but through many trials God set me free from that.

In my first year of college, I began to slowly drift away from God. I no longer had my youth minister to watch over me, or my youth group at home for fellowship. To be honest, I didn’t even feel like I could relate with any Christians on campus. I went to the BSU for a while, but eventually stopped going. This continued until I met another true father-like/ older brother figure, by the name of Riley Prather (Riley was my F.I.S.H. dad in the BSU). Riley took me under his wing, devoted time to listening to me, and advised me in some of the most important things in life. Honestly, if God hadn’t had put him in my life I prolly wouldn’t be where I am today. All this led up to me finally submitting to God’s calling to ministry on my life, and my continual pursuit of that.

Since then, I have grown a lot, spiritually (not to say I am a whole lot better, but that God has taken me a long ways from where I once was, and the old times are almost hard to even remember). I have had many ups and downs (more downs than ups), but I haven’t given up. I continually find out more about the Christian-life, more about the God who loves me and desires to use me in His work, and more about the ministry we all have as Christians (to know Christ, and make Him known). Looking back, I couldn't see my life being written any other way. God has blessed me huge in my lifetime. What makes me even more grateful is that the God i serve has shown His power in the way He can take something so painful, sorrowful, and all around messed up (such as my childhood and life up until now), and turn it into something that beautifully glorifies Him, and all that He is. I can't even stress enough how amazing it is for God to take someone so messed up, and still let His light shine on that person, and in that persons life.